Imprisonment can have a profound impact on family life, particularly for children. They may have questions about where their loved one is, and when they'll be home.
There are a number or organisations who specialise in supporting families with a loved one in custody, detailed in our support organisations area.
It can be difficult to tell a child their loved one is in prison. Every family’s situation is different, and there may be circumstances in which it’s better not to tell children about it.
They may want to know where their loved one is and why. They may need reassurance that the person is safe, and that they’ll be able to see them or talk to them, if it is appropriate.
If you decide to do so, it is important to tell children the truth about where their relative has gone, even if they are very young. There are ways to explain to the child in an age-appropriate way that their loved one has gone to prison, and be honest about how long they will be gone for.
If you’re unsure about whether or how to talk to your children, it may be helpful to consult with specialist organisations such as Families Outside, who work to support families with a loved one in prison.
Families Outside websiteYou can help children by talking about their feelings. They may feel anger towards their loved one for going away, or towards police or other authority figures for taking the person away from them. If they can talk about these feelings, they’re less likely to feel overwhelmed by their emotions.
Support books
Families Outside have created the My Story workbook, written by a young person who's parent was in prison. It describes the direct experience of a child affected by imprisonment from their point of view, and has a number of practical exercises which can help children cope with the event.
Maintaining and rebuilding contact
If you know which prison the child's loved one is in, you can contact the prison's Family Contact Officers (FCOs) to discuss different ways of maintaining or rebuilding contact with them. Contact numbers for FCO teams are on the individual prison pages.
Find FCO contact detailsVisiting someone in prison can be daunting for both adults and children. Seeing a parent or loved one can be a positive experience for you and your child, and maintaining contact and engagement with a parent can also help ease the feeling of separation.
Our staff work hard to create a visiting environment that is inclusive and engaging.
Children are welcome to partake in all visit sessions (unless specified), and establishments offer a range of visit types for different age groups and abilities. This can include bonding visits and children's visits.
See our visiting page to learn more about the visit process and what to expect, and individual prison pages to find visit timetables.
Understandably a prison environment can be difficult for children, and particularly those with additional support needs.
We encourage you to contact the establishment's Family Contact Officers (FCOs) and prison visitor centre to discuss your individual child’s needs.
Our FCOs and visitor centre teams are there to support you, and can advise best on how to assist in maintaining contact and visiting.